Summertime, and livin' is easy

I got to spend an amazing weekend with my girlfriends in a cabin at Old Man's Cave. We drank and danced and threw up from all the fun.

Since Aimee was still in town from NC, we went out tonight for dinner and a beer. I showed her all the places in Westerville that allow alcohol now that the ban was finally abolished last November. And of course since you can't throw a rock without hitting someone you know in this town, I ran into someone I made out with. Yikes.

I tried to ignore him, and pretend I didn't know him. Ya know... the mature thing to do. But I was called out on my acts of snobbery with the old, "I see how it is... you can't even say hi."

So I pulled the "OH! HI!!!! How are you?" So we chatted and we both agreed that the last time we saw each other we were both pretty drunk. (Does that mean it erased the fact that we made out? In a bar? Where my parents' friends potentially saw? Because I hope so.) All in all it was awkward, but funny, because that shit seems to always happen to me.

But it was a nice evening with Aimee, especially since I never get to see her. And on the way home alone, since I was in such a good mood, I rolled down the window and blared Harry Nilsson's "Without You" and Meat Loaf's "I Would do Anything for Love (But I won't do that)" and sang at the top of my lungs. I am pretty sure that there was a group of kids hanging out at the resevoir that heard me, but I didn't care. It is one of those nights in the summer where the temperature is perfect and it should be celebrated with song.

Slaminky Malargy to you and yours...

Now Playing: "Trouble" by Ray LaMontagne

"Do you pee your pants all the time?"

I'll try not to make this sound like a "you had to be there" type of story.

I had such a great night with my parents. It was one of those nights where you sit around the kitchen table and laugh and tell stories and laugh some more. Sometimes you laugh so much that a little pee comes out.

It started after dinner. My dad is the kind of dad who does calisthenics to keep in shape. (You know... sit ups, trunk twists, push ups.) He does these most nights after dinner on the living room floor as me or my sister wipe up from the meal. I don't really know why he does these exercises, because he does extremely strenuous physical work all day long, and I wouldn't think he would need a "refresher course" not long after his work day is done. I guess it's for flexibility.

Anyway, I was prompting him to do push ups. And by prompting him, I mean heckling him. A few "old mans" were thrown in there for good measure. He finished his leg stretches and did a set of push ups, punctuating each one with an exhale made through gritted teeth. Mom and I watched and I have to say I was impressed.

"You totally turned Mom on."

"You really did!"

"I did? OH YEAH!!"


So instead of stopping there, I bet Mom she could still do a handstand. (Apparently my goal was to put my parents in traction.) She did a few headstands and tried a handstand with my dad spotting her so her flailing legs wouldn't break the lamp on the end table. All the while, I am sitting back laughing at each human trick I am getting my folks to perform.

"Can you skip?"

"I don't know. I haven't tried in 45-50 years."

Then I got the pleasure of watching my 55 year old father skip across the kitchen floor. I laughed so hard I peed myself. Ya know... just a few drops. Then it's my mom's turn. She pranced with a little more grace, but it was still one of the funniest sights I've seen in a long time. I was asked to prove my skipping skills, which I did with Chorus Line fashion.

"You know, you had a real problem with skipping when you were a little girl."

"Yeah... I know. I used to gallop along and call it skipping. I looked like an idiot."

"I remember talking to Grandma about it. I was kind of worried."

"Dad. You could probably gallop faster than you can run. You should do that in the [sofbtall] game coming up."

Dad proceeds to gallop all over the kitchen.

still galloping "You know what? You're right!"

We rounded out the night by busting out old home movies. I am pretty sure my sister was the cutest kid ever created. I, on the other hand, was a child I would have smacked... a lot.

My parents are going to be sore tomorrow.

Slaminky Malargy to you and yours...

"In My Life" by The Beatles