I know why Germans love him....

I received this link from an avid Hoff fan, Elena, and after watching it (twice) I can't decide if I think it's hilarious or frightening. I am pretty sure its both.

He used to remind me of a big toe. Now, I don't know what to think.

Slaminky Malargy to you and yours...

Now Playing: "Stoned, Pt. 1" by Lewis Taylor (some baby making music. A MUST download.)

FYA

I have a new review up on fyamag.com

There is a link to the right, it's a movie review on "The New World."

Enjoy.

Slaminky Malargy to you and yours...

Now Playing: "Radio" by Alkaline Trio

You know what he did?!

I had seen this before, but my sister Megan brought it to my attention again last night.

It is currently my favorite thing on the internet. When life seems like its a raining shit cloud, something like this pops up and oddly enough, makes things better.

In case you were wondering, the "Lazy Sunday" skit from SNL was my last favorite thing on the internet. (As was everyone elses.)

Slaminky Malargy to you and yours...

Now Playing: "Make-up Sex" by Clear Static

But all the colors mix together... to grey...

Yoga did not do its job tonight. It did not clear my mind. It did not leave me to be one with my sticky mat. Although I worked hard and feel physically stretched, I was not left with my usual feeling of enlightenment.

Instead I stewed for an hour about:

~the movie review that just won't write itself for fyamag.com (then came some berating for all the reasons I still don't have a job in my field)

~the pedicure I so desperately need if I am going to expose these piggies on a weekly basis.

~the seething jealousy of a friend's new relationship, and how damn easy it is for some people. (I am NEVER "some people")

~how people I look up to can hurt my feelings over a fleeting comment, and how people at work can insult me on a daily basis and I just laugh because they are idiots. And how silly I feel about getting upset about those hurt feelings.

~how I have gone to bed and woken up with pounding headaches for the past 2 days.

~how song lyrics can unleash a fury of tears for no reason.... or reasons you wish didn't exist.


So.......


Dear Yoga,

Next week you better come through for me. I still love you though.

Smooches,

Erin


Slaminky Malargy to you and yours...

Now Playing: "Grey Street" by Dave Matthews Band

Brusha, Brusha, Brusha

I am pretty boring lately. The highlight of my week is my recent purchase of the new Whitening Listerine. Is it wrong that I can't wait to gargle tonight?

My life is officially sad.

Slaminky Malargy to you and yours...

Now Playing: "Dare" by Gorillaz

Ragtop Day?

We had some inclimate weather here in Columbus, Ohio yesterday. It was snowing and sleeting and being a real skanky bitch. I usually curse this type of weather anytime after Dec. 25th and yesterday was no different. But Ohio weather is about as unpredictable as Courtney Love at an awards show, and by this morning the snow had melted and the sun was shining and it was rather warm for a mid-January day.

Just because it is in the high forties and you can feel slight warmth on your face DOES NOT MEAN YOU CAN PUT THE TOP DOWN ON YOUR CONVERTIBLE, YOU ASSHOLES. This is probably one of my biggest pet peeves.

Until this past summer, my family had a 1961 Corvette that I absolutely LOVED. We had it since I was about 7 years old, and I wanted to inherit someday. This obviously did not happen since we sold it to a collector, but I loved the fact that I got to drive it in my senior homecoming parade, as did my sister. I also was permitted to take it out to go to softball games and joy rides.

Not ONCE did I take that baby out in any weather colder than 76 degrees. (Well, I don't really know the exact temperature, but aside from homecoming parades, it was a SUMMER car.)

I can't stand seeing idiots drive down the road with the windows up, but their tops are down.... they probably have the heat on too. LUDICROUS. (Notice how people will spell "ludicrous" like "ludacris" since the rapper hit the scene with "Fantasy"?) There is no reason for the convertible to be utilized until you don't have to wear a coat outside. I saw 2 people today driving with the tops down and I seriously wanted to t-bone them.


Slaminky Malargy to you and yours....

Now Playing: "Golden Brown" by The Stranglers

Scratch and Sniff

I was told today that I had the nose of a bloodhound.

I said thank you. I am pretty sure it was a compliment.

Slaminky Malargy to you and yours...

Now Playing: "I Feel Free" by Cream

Blunk Drogging

I am, currently a little tipsy. And althought my spelling might be stellar... it isn't always when I have had a few cocktails. (Just ask Marit.)

I had the choice to either drive home from the bar (me and my Pops are glad I didn't), or get a ride home from two good looking boys.... hmmm...

Anywho... I am not big on drinking and driving, so I took the ride, and I am safe and quite pleased that I did some sucessful flirting tonight.

Um... so yeah... this will probably be the only time I talk about anything NEAR my love life. But all I know is I am a smitten kitten.

Slaminky Malargy to you and yours...

Now Playing: "Bra" by Cymande

Rainy days and Mondays always get me down....

I am posting at f-ing 7:45 a.m. because I started my step aerobics class this morning. I didn't sign up for this hour of hell because of any New Years resolution (because I work out more than just the month of Jan.), as I thought the class started about a month ago, but was an idiot and didn't read the start date. So I am starting off my New Year with a little A.M. ass kicking with my cousin Andrea.

I'm not gonna lie....first day sucked. I am not TOO out of shape, but I definitely need to rehab my knee a little more, and hopefully this does the trick. Second, I HATE step classes. I have this extreme fear of missing the damn thing completely only to crack another limb with a nice little tumble. I hope these damn endorphins start kicking in soon, because if not some one is getting roundhoused to the face. (Maybe my disposition has something to do with PMS and cramps? COULDN'T BE!)

Tomorrow I start my yoga class, again with Andrea, (TANGENT: she is a great workout partner. She humors me and laughs at my lame jokes, and lets me whine a little because my knee feels like its going to fall off. She is also a great shopping partner.) We both have never done yoga, and I am mostly doing it to regain the lost flexibility of what I like to call "my dancing days." I used to be able to do all my splits and hold my leg over my head.... ALL GRACEFULLY. Somewhere admist all the keg stands and drunk stumbles home, I lost most of that lithe limber-ness and I am despereately trying to get it back.

These classes will hopefully take my mind off the fact that I didn't get the job that I interviewed for right before Christmas. They gave it to a 40 year old virgin (as I like to call him) with a PhD who is "trying to get back into journalism." Thanks a lot.

Hope everyone has a good Monday.

Slaminky Malargy to you and yours...

Now Playing: "Valley Winter Song" by Fountains of Wayne (thanks to Scotty Gee)

All You Need is Love

We just packed my sister up and sent her back to BGSU to start her winter semester. In the matter of about a 15-20 minutes:

-I chased the turkey from our backyard.

-I mooned everyone.... twice.

-Dad tried to push me out in front of Megan's moving car.

-Mom threatened to kick Dad in the balls.

-I rammed Dad into the bushes in the front yard.

-Dad swung for my face and I felt the breeze of his knuckles passing my cheek.

-They locked me out of the house in my t-shirt and sandals. (It's like 29 degrees here)

-I laughed as Dad struggled to fit Megan's ten speed in the back seat.

-I crop dusted Dad as he hung up his coat.

-I tried to hit Dad in the balls with a rolled up yoga mat, and he smacked me in the neck with rolled up newspaper.

-I "shook the shit" out of Mom, because she is so tiny, and I can.

Apparently we try to show Megan what she is missing when she is at school. I expect to see her again sometime in early summer.

Slaminky Malargy to you and yours...

Now Playing: "Get Out of my Dreams; Get into my Car" by Billy Ocean

Fetish?

I got this email from from dude on Flickr today:


"Just wanted to say Nice Pics and that your really cute I hope we can chat sometime. Have u ever had any sprains or broken bones on your cute self? Happy New Year!! Hope to hear from you soon."


Although I enjoy compliments of any kind, I was kind of sketched out on the broken bones segment of the email. So I did a little exploring on his photo site and found a slight personal ad. that read:

"Army guy currently in Iraq likes to chat with a lady whos been on crutches. if thats you and your looking to chat email me at "

How creepy is that? Has anyone ever known anyone like this before? I am probably his soul mate considering I have broken every limb. But I am sure as hell not going to tell HIM that!!

Slaminky Malargy to you and yours...

Now Playing: "Walking With a Ghost" by Tegan and Sara

Oh yeah... HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!